Why is every mom reading books like her life depends on it?
Also, a list of Substack articles for your weekend
Saturday Morning Serial is the weekend section of Library Binding. It’s a personal corner where I publish short stories, book reviews, and literary musings.
About three years ago, I hustled my boys into Jiu Jitsu. They skittered onto the mat to join their classmates, and I flung myself into one of the plastic chairs provided for parents.
Then, I noticed one of the other moms. She’s extra-tall with a gorgeous smile. Outgoing and friendly as can be.
This particular mom usually makes small talk while she waits. But that day, she was reading a book.
I recognized the book as Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley.
I immediately asked her how she was liking it.
She smiled thin, like an apology, and said, “It’s okay.” Then she admitted, “My mom group from church is reading it, so I’m trying to finish, you know, push through. I’m not a big reader.”
I understood her plight. Not everyone likes to read, and when you’re wrangling three little kids, who has time?
But I’ll tell you. I know a lot of women who DO get back into reading books after having kids.
On a different day at Jiu Jitsu, I chatted with another mom about her obsession with Colleen Hoover. This fascinated me because I did not enjoy either of the Hoover books that I DNFed. She admitted they aren’t for everyone, and then I told her to tell me how Verity ends, and she did, happily. I met another mom at the playground who gushed over Brandon Sanderson and how a family friend knows his personal assistant and obtained signed copies for her birthday. I heartily congratulated her.
I have mom friends who have completely converted to audiobooks and devour series after series that way. I have mom friends who write the most thoughtful and personal book reviews that I wish I could pay them a salary for their contributions to the literary landscape. I can probably rattle off at least 10 Substacks dedicated to books, written by moms.
Important Note: I’ve chosen to focus this piece on motherhood because I’m a mom, not a dad. But, I’m curious if dads also experience a similar resurgence of literary zeal.
Why do we turn to books in motherhood?
I was thinking about it the other day, and this is what came to me.
Motherhood, especially full-time motherhood, is harder and more chaotic than we thought it would be. Because the kids are supplying more than enough adventure, we find ourselves gravitating toward calm pastimes. Reading is the quiet corner that we crave.
Many of us used to be readers and then fell out of the habit because we got busy with work. In certain ways, motherhood slows us down and opens up more time at home. Somehow, books worm their way into that slow time, and we remember our lost love.
We start reading to our kids, and that snowballs into reading for our personal pleasure and enrichment. It rekindles the joy.
Motherhood, especially in the early stages, can be mind-numbing in many respects, and reading helps keep our gray matter from going to seed.
Parenting-related concerns and problems drive us to seek answers in books, especially now as the internet becomes less reliable by the day. I’ve read my share of gems and stinkers from the Parenting section.
Movies and TV have become increasingly unwatchable and/or overstimulating, and so we reach for a book when we need to unwind (and when we have the fortitude not to scroll).
I could also make the ungenerous observation that any of the above can become healthy or unhealthy, depending on how we’re approaching life. There have been times when I read hard books because they made me feel intelligent. There have been times when I’ve read escapist books with less-than-worthy content because they distracted me from life. There have been times when I’ve turned to self-help gurus before turning to God’s word. These are unpleasant realities, but I try to be honest with myself when I have the wherewithal.
Do you read more now that you’re a parent?
Anyhow, this was on my mind, and I’m wondering, do you read more now than you used to? Did becoming a parent drive you back to the library? I’d love to know.
Speaking of reading, here are some articles I bookmarked
Some of these are new, some old. I felt they were worth the share.
Learning How to Learn by Dissident Teacher
Learning how to take structured lecture notes was a game-changer for me in school. I am resolved to start teaching more robust note-taking (slowly) with my kids when we start our homeschool year in the fall.
Summer Gaol by Sara Bannerman
If you read anything for pure entertainment this summer, read this. Sara has a special way of describing real-life moments—just read it and you’ll see. This post is the first in her series.
Can the Apple be Unbitten? by Grant Martsolf
I’ve shared this before, but it’s still one of the best articles I’ve read on the tradeoffs that we make when we outsource tasks to AI.
How James Bond Can Fix the Crisis in Masculinity by Ted Gioia
Feel free to agree or disagree, but I tucked away “Ted’s Advice” as a touchstone of sorts.
You never outgrow creative play by Rebecca J. Gomez
I’m glad I’m not the only one who believes this. Funny enough, before I read this, I’d requested some titles on bookbinding from my interlibrary loan. What are your creative outlets?
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. –Prov. 31:30
I’ll leave you with one irresistible indulgence—for the well-read card sender.
Your devoted,
Michelle
The Novel Envelope
Slow mail for lovers of classic tales
The Novel Envelope is a monthly snail-mail subscription that delivers a classic short story, curated book list, surprise paper goodie, and more to your (real) mailbox.
For $5 per month, you get to retreat into a soft, still analog space. I'll bring a classic author with me, and we'll share words and ideas across the miles.
Slow down. Savor a story. Write something by hand.
Vol. 2: Laughter and Regret mails on July 1.
Such a great topic! I would say that I read about the same amount now, as a mom, as I did pre-kids, but my reading looks different, both in content and medium. There are plenty of read-alouds, and my personal reading is all audio or on Kindle (easier than print copies while reading when nursing the baby or on the treadmill or elliptical, where I get time to myself).
Many of the women I know who took up reading since having kids did so to fill time once they’d left the workplace to stay home, or they got into it while breastfeeding and kept going once the baby was older. It seems like most of my mom friends prefer audiobooks over other book formats. And many find an author (usually Colleen Hoover) or a series (generally romantasy) they love and stick with them.
I can attest to your reading and motherhood ideas. I was an avid reader before kids and found much less time to read for myself until the kids were reading on their own. During the period of reading less and for the only time in my life, I reread books....because it's a quicker read if you read it before and I was curious if some of what I had read in my teens and 20's still held up in my 30's. I also dipped into some of the books that my husband brought with him and that was interesting too. After I went back to work full-time was another period of less reading. We started an after-work book club and that insured that I read at least one book a month. Now that I'm retired I'm reading a lot more and I'm loving audiobooks too. I usually have 1 or 2 books I'm reading and my TBR pile is high!
Thanks for the article on creative play. It was my mantra when I was in early childhood... young children learn and grow best through play. That is my work for most days now that I'm retired. As George Bernard Shaw said, "“We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”